PRIMUS
SAILING THE SEAS OF CHEESE
ALBUM REVIEW
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SAILING THE SEAS OF CHEESE, the 2nd beautifully bizarre edition of “the Sunday funny papers of metal”, brought to you by El Sobrante, California’s genius weirdo trio, PRIMUS, is the gold standard of the eccentric sound of “boxless” progressive, funk metal overtones filtered through a heroic dose of psychedelic infused absurdity and combined with an ample sized bowl of surreal silliness.
With drum beats that are right, smack dab ”in the pocket”, bass lines that defy the laws of music and reality, orchestrated, atonal, guitar noise that’s always a tad off, and lyrics covering a vast array of peculiar and unusual topics, ranging from promiscuous cats to reckless race car drivers to weird time signatures to sheer luck, SAILING THE SEAS OF CHEESE is one of those recordings that every metal head with a well-defined sillier side (and a “sophisticated palette”) must possess.
PRIMUS ON THE INTERWEBS: https://primusville.com/
Les Claypool – vocals
Larry LaLonde – guitar
Tim "Herb" Alexander – drums
Released - 5/14/1991
Recorded - January 1991
Label - Interscope
Producer - Primus
1 Seas of Cheese
2 Here Come the Bastards
3 Sgt. Baker
4 American Life
5 Jerry Was a Race Car Driver
6 Eleven
7 Is It Luck?
8 Grandad's Little Ditty
9 Tommy the Cat
10 Sathington Waltz
11 Those Damned Blue-Collar Tweekers
12 Fish On (Fisherman Chronicles, Chapter II)
13 Los Bastardos
Grab a handful of relaxation and enjoy “a positive Applebee’s experience” while also noting that this is our 2nd PRIMUS episode featuring a story about Applebee’s (seriously, what are the odds of that happening almost 3 years later!?).
Discover the reason McDonald’s is diabolical and why it’s exactly like something else that’s “not even the same ballpark”, understand that it’s perfectly okay to have “different tastes” with regard to entertainment shown “in slow motion”, and brace yourself for a first time Steve Harvey impression that morphed into a Katt Williams impression that was followed by an even better, more impressive Katt Williams impression when you JOIN US as we gear up to go snorkeling through the caverns of queso while SAILING THE SEAS OF CHEESE.
SEAS OF CHEESE
Definitely ON the boat!
Prepare to depart the safety of the shore for the adventurous seas of cheese.
“When some trendy new atrocity has brought you to your knees…”
HERE COME THE BASTARDS
A tad ominous. Heavy and sparce, yet also “thick and full”.
With Tim (“Herb” Alexander) and Les (Claypool) in the rhythm section (drums and bass, respectively) and Larry (LaLonde) playing guitar completely differently than he did in his former band (Possessed), Primus generates a most uniquely joyful yet absurdly musical noise.
“Bury your head deep in the sand,
Anonymity is a virtue, in this day and age…”
SGT. BAKER
Use those headphones as there’s a lot going on in the background. The lyrics are just as brutal as Sgt. Baker would have you believe HE is.
(Think R. Lee Ermey’s character on Full Metal Jacket: Gunnery Seargent Hartman)
Actually, this song pairs up well with Too Many Puppies, in terms of the military theme.
“I will rape your personality,
Pummel you with my own philosophy,
Strip you of your self-integrity,
To make you all just a bit like me…
AMERICAN LIFE
Definitely a unique bassline, primarily in that the bassline seems to continue almost continuously, non-stop, throughout the entire song. The slide guitar section definitely ups the anxiety while the guitar near the end might be the most melodic thing on this album.
“…And they look to the Statue of Liberty…
…And he writes home tales of prosperity…
…And he holds on tight to his dignity…
For the boy we have American Life…”
JERRY WAS A RACE CAR DRIVER
One of the most iconic bass lines in all of music. You just hear this and you KNOW it’s Les Claypool.
Saw this video on Headbanger’s Ball back in the day and the first impression was just like everyone else’s:
“WTF was THAT?”
It’s heavy. Say what you want, but it is…especially when that distortion kicks in.
“Jerry was a race car driver,
Twenty-two years old,
One too many cold beers one night,
Wrapped himself around a telephone pole, GO!”
ELEVEN
A very cool, albeit very strange intro, which is actually in 11/4 time (or 11/8 …regardless, it’s in 11), and then when it switches to the main riff, it stays in 11/4, a time signature that does not easily “fit into society” relative to the standard 4/4 time signatures that comes standard on most metal songs.
2:53 – use those headphones…it splits…it sounds like 2 separate audio tracks in each ear, like something QOTSA would do.
“I just can’t seem to blend into society…”
IS IT LUCK?
What the hell kinda bass line is THAT!? Read those lyrics…yeah, we’re not sure either.
The change at 2:21 is absolutely insane!
The lyrical interlude at 2:30 and the “bass fart” at 2:46 before it goes back into the fray makes me laugh every single time.
Primus helps us to take life only as seriously as we actually should, which is minimally, because life is chock full of absurdity.
“She whispered in my ear,
She said, “You want to get lucky, little boy?”
GRANDADDY’S LITTLE DITTY
And now, time to break out the mind bleach…
BTW, flatus is the actual gas inside your guts, whereas flatulence is the passing of said gas from inside your guts through your butthole to the outside of your body.
Remember, we pride ourselves on being an educational podcast.
TOMMY THE CAT
Killer bass line, actually everything about this song is awesome…including the guest vocals courtesy of Tom Waits.
Definitely go check out the music video. Remember that EVERY Primus music video is the perfect visual representation to accompany the audio. It would be awesome to see Les actually make a full-length movie.
“Truly a wonder of nature, this urban predator,
Tommy The Cat had many a story to tell,
But it was a rare occasion such as this, that he did…”
SATHINGTON WALTZ
This sounds like the perfect soundtrack to actually being on the boat pictured on the album cover.
The greatest thing about Primus is that they perfectly depict what it’s like to be actually high on drugs when describing to someone who’s never done drugs what actually being on drugs is actually like…
THOSE DAMNED BLUE COLLAR TWEEKERS
A siren…and the Love Theme from Jaws…
Being the early 90’s, this might have been around the time of Crank (aka Meth).
“Now the union boys are there to protect us from all the corporate type,
While curious George’s drug patrol is out here hunting snipe…”
FISH ON (FISHERMAN CHRONICLES, CHAPTER II)
The intro seems very reminiscent of “Anesthesia (Pulling Teeth)” from Metallica’s Kill ‘Em All, but with Les Claypool’s style. Very cool.
A sequel, no doubt, to “John The Fisherman” from the debut album, Frizzle Fry.
After the opening bass solo, the mood becomes heavier and darker, resembling the anxious anticipation that leads up to “catching the big one” that takes the bait on the hook and runs the line out (which starts at 4:51).
That bass line sounds like something out of a game show. Guessing the part at 6:15 is when the line snaps or when the fish is finally wrangled into the boat.
“Well, hey, hey, hey,
I’ll be screwed,
Blued and tattooed,
Looks like I got me one of them,
Fish on…Fish on…”
LOS BASTARDOS
A reprise of “Here Come The Bastards”. The “You bastards!” sounds like it was borrowed from Monty Python (NOTE: this actually came from “The Young Ones”).
Show Notes:
(00:01): “It’s almost the end of #AmericanHistoryMonth …”/ “That’s #antiAmerican bruh…”/ #MrBlack ***WARNING: #listenerdiscretionisadvised *** / “Billiam sporting #TheWarningShirt #MetalNerderyWarning / ***WELCOME BACK TO THE METAL NERDERY PODCAST!!!*** / #thisepisodesbeeroftheepisode / “Yeah man…”/ #DeathMetalFont #ScepterBrewingArts
Beer of the Episode
Death Metal Font
#ScepterArtsBrewing #DecaturGeorgia #DickHater / “It’s got a carpet flavor…”/ #rimshot / #HazyIPA #sixpointfiveABV / “Definitely a little carpet…”/ #icecoldbeer / “Here’s why…”/ “I can get an ice bucket down here…”/ “That one…not the one above it…the one that’s over there…”/ #followmyfinger / ***IF YOU WANT TO SKIP THE NONSENSE AND GO STRAIGHT TO THE MEAT OF THE EPISODE, GO TO #THEDOCKET *** / “Last night, we were both tired, but we needed dinner…”/ #RussellsReflectionsRestaurantEdition / “It’s either a #divebar or we go to #locallyownedrestaurants …”/ “It’s so funny you mention that…”/ #TJApplebees and/or #Applebees / #flattentheherd / “That’s a great idea!” / #TiffanyLights / “What are we walking into?” / #TheVerdict / #peoplewatching / “It’s kind of an interesting thing…people are just people…”/ #backstoryASMR / “Somebody told me about someone they knew making money as a #footfetish #pornographer …”/ “Walk through a chocolate cake…”/ “I’m always looking right at the snootch…”/ “Nice hands…it raises the face and lowers the hands…”/ #bigtoethumb #Transformer / “Don’t women have Adam’s apples, though?”
(14:34): “What about some #Patreon …?” / ***PATREON SHOUTOUT!!!*** / ***You can JOIN US at patreon.com/metalnerderypodcast *** / #ThankYou / “I didn’t need it, I just wanted it…”/ #McDonalds / “It’s the same thing, dude…only the names have changed…”/ ***If you’d like to email us, hit us up at metalnerdery@gmail.com ***/ ***CHECK US OUT ON THE SOCIAL MEDIA AT #METALNERDERYPODCAST AND LEAVE US A VOICEMAIL AT 980-666-8182!!!*** / #whoareyou / #EmberingEffigy #NewSong ***COMING OUT MARCH 4TH *** / “That last voicemail…I figured out who it was…”/ “He is the Geesh god btw…”/ “You’re allowed to say colors now, and black is all the colors…” / #whoarethey sir?
(20:43): #TheDocket METAL NERDERY PODCAST PRESENTS: PRIMUS – SAILING THE SEAS OF CHEESE / “They’re #surrealmetal …”/ “I would say #progressivefunkmetal / #Primus #PrimusSucks #PrimusDoesntSuck / “It’s like a weird orchestrated noise…”/ “Once you get past about 50, everything hurts…”/ “Learned that in Dangole County…”/ Released May 14, 1991 / “Tales from the pole…”/ “Which do you think would be more risky?” / #bigtime / “I knew you were gonna say that…”/ #onlythenameschange / “I got a kiss on the cheek from the first stripper I gave a dollar to…”/ “Maybe get the man in the boat…”/ #Hangover / “Your face reminded me of that…”/ #RussellsReflectionsGloryDaysASMR / “You can say colors, dude…”
(28:28): “After we did the #InsideTheMetal for them, I was constantly listening to ‘Too Many Puppies’…”/ SEAS OF CHEESE / HERE COME THE BASTARDS / #thickandfull / “All the progressive music…is #boxless …”/ “I think you know…”/ #whatsthatnoise? / “I did not know that…I didn’t know that…”/ “I could visualize what the studio looked like…”/ “It’s not #trans dude…”/ #relaxervision / #usethoseheadphones / SGT. BAKER / “I don’t remember hearing that…I never heard that before…”/ #usethoseheadphonesASMR / #fullmetaljacket / “You ain’t got no horns, boy…”/ “Everything always fit, too…”/ “He was the Dave Mustaine of Primus…but that band was not Geddy Lee’s band…it’s not Primus without that dude…”/ #BassPlayersArePeopleToo / “Russ used to be a person…”/ “Either that’s a dildo or a guitar…”
(38:56): “Sometimes it takes time to grow into things…”/ #potsmokerperspective / “It’ll put you in that mood…”/ “If you’re high, Primus is definitely good listening…”/ AMERICAN LIFE / “That slide is kind of eerie…”/ “It sounds way bigger than 3 people…”/ “They played this on #HeadbangersBall back in the day…”/ JERRY WAS A RACECAR DRIVER / “Steamy…”/ “He’s like the #AceVentura of metal…”/ “Yes you need to shave your balls…”/ NOTE: He’s talking about Kung Fu Rascals which came out in 1992 / #supersilly / “Why you gotta be ching chong?”
(47:52): “Isn’t it weird that he’s in his 60’s?” / “If you count it, it’s 11…you’ll see…”/ ELEVEN (NOTE: the intro is also in 11…either 11/4 or 11/8…the real musicians can correct us as needed.) / “Who is THEY?”/ “My socks and shoes always match…”/ IS IT LUCK? / “This part is great…it’s so great…”/ “But she wasn’t impressed…”/ #bassfart / “Strokin’ up?”/ GRANDADDY’S LITTLE DITTY / #flatus / TOMMY THE CAT / #TomWaits / “That’s a whole lotta Rosie right there…”/ Les Claypool’s bass playing style / “He’s using all the tools in the toolbox…”/ “Their videos…for people who’ve never done drugs…this is what drugs is like…”/ SATHINGTON WALTZ / “This sounds like weed…” / “I have a story to share after this…”/ “It was 1998…that night, I did some of that 3 letter drug with some friends…”/ #lysergicreflectionsASMR / “Dude, these are John Petrucci’s hands…”/ “That’s a Cadillac, isn’t it?”/ “I think…they should make a pornography channel…with nothing but slow motion porn…”/ #differenttastes / “Like the #TacoBell gong?”
(1:03:00): THOSE DAMNED BLUE-COLLAR TWEEKERS / “It might be meth because coke was more of an elitist drug…”/ #TrampledUnderFoot / #secrethandshake / “Hey-yuh…”/ “Blue collar people make the world go around…”/ #Morris #9Lives / “If you’re tenured, you can never be fired…”/ “It’s a dog joke, dude…relax, take it easy…”/ #RussellsReflectionsServiceDogEdition / “If that’s a service animal, this is my girlfriend…”/ FISH ON (FISHERMAN CHRONICLES, CHAPTER II) / #Primusthesia / NOTE: Les knew Kirk, not Cliff… / “Sourdough was the best part of that whole recipe…”/ “I think he got him one, man…pull it in, man…”/ “It’s like if #Rush did the theme music for a #gameshow …”/ #ThePriceIsRight / “Most comedians…were looking for the gameshow or the sitcom…”/ NOTE: Dave Mustaine was on #TheDrewCareyShow at one point / “What was that voice you just did?” / “It was #KattWilliams and you know what…”/ “That’s a good impression…”/ #RussellsImpressionsASMR / LOS BASTARDOS (NOTE: It’s from #TheYoungOnes and not #MontyPython) / “Real quick, back to the Katt Williams thing…”/ “You can buy a lot of therapy and heroin for $50 Million…”/ THANK YOU FOR JOINING US!!! / #untilthenext #outroreel